Tcl Poetry - a place for poems or other creative bits about (or in) Tcl.
When I was a Lad edit
Stu 2004-05-14: "When I was a Lad" from
H.M.S. Pinafore
by Gilbert and Sullivan
When I was a lad I served a term
As coding grunt in a dot-com firm
I used [read] quite often and then sometimes [gets]
And I made my GUIs by [grid]ing my widg-ets
(He made his GUIs by [grid]ding his widg-ets!)
I [grid]ded all my widgets so carefully
That now I am a member of the TCT
(He [grid]ded all his widgets so carefully, that now he is a member of the TCT!)
As coding grunt I made such a stir
That they gave me the post of a pro-gram-mer
I prototyped in ANSI such as is my wont
And I printed out my listings in a twelve point font
(He printed out his listings in a twelve point font!)
I printed out my listings so beautifully
That now I am a member of the TCT
(He printed out his listings so beautifully, that now he is a member of the TCT!)
In crafting [proc]s I made such a name
That a writer of TIPs I soon became
The wheels in motion, my submission did set
For the TIP approval process on the In-ter-net
(For the TIP approval process on the In-ter-net!)
That TIP approval process did so well for me
That now I am a member of the TCT
(That TIP approval process did so well for he, that now he is a member of the TCT!)
My TIPs were so spiffy, there was no debate
That I found myself a cushy job at ActiveState
I got that job and was ever so glad
'Twas the only job I ever had had
('Twas the only job he ever had had!)
That kind of job so suited me
That now I am a member of the TCT
(That kind of job so suited he, that now he is a member of the TCT!)
I grew so smart (smarter than a goat)
That several quite important TIPs required my vote
I always voted at JH's call
And I never thought of thinking for myself at all
(He never thought of thinking for himself at all!)
I thought so little, they rewarded me
By making me a member of the TCT
(He thought so little they rewarded he, by making him a member of the TCT!)
Now coders all whoever you may be
If you want to rise to the top of the tree
If your soul isn't fettered to a corporate tool
Be careful to be guided by this golden rule
(Be careful to be guided by this golden rule!)
Write [proc]s docs and tests ... and license BSD
And you'll all be a member of the TCT!
(Write [proc]s docs and tests and license BSD, and you'll all be a member of the TCT!) Tcl Noir edit
dbohdan 2016-05-02: The following is inspired by
Larry Wall's
Black Perl. It is a valid Tcl program that runs to the end. No text is quoted, since that would have made it too easy.
Run with
wish 8.6.
dbohdan 2016-10-20: I'm happy to add that this poem has since won the
Source Code Poetry contest for 2016 in the category "most impressive submission".
#! /usr/bin/env wish
# Tcl Noir
# by dbohdan
package names
package versions ,microfilms
proc ure _ evidence
after idle chat
set of names
join forces with
array $of informants
lassign [list of] tasks
label .suspects
lsearch for answers
catch glimpses
return -level 0 results
info exists somewhere!
lsearch some more
catch yourself thinking,
frame .someone?
try violence \
trap real evildoers vainly \
trap vicious crooks \
reflect on error made ""
scale .mountains--
entry .forbidden
try everything \
finally exit
